Head Hunter

One head hunter called me last week to see I were interested to work for another furniture company as BDM(Business Development Manager). I will be taking charge of helping the company to set up local francise shops, and my major activities will be in the Klang valley. At first, she doesn't want to reveal much and after my constant probe in, she said it was a local company. She asked where my actual interest lies. It was a tough question. If I told her the truth, I can guarantee you that she will not call back. My true passion is in academic research in aerospace engineering. I am very fascinated in Hypersonic Transport Aircraft and the electric propulsion system, which can propel space craft to a maxium speed of close to the ligh speed(since theory of relativity dictates that it will not be possible to achieve actual lightspeed we can only go at close to it. In other word, we will be infinitismally close; somethig like delc -> infinity. It may sound very sci-fi but yes we did discuss this at jet propulsion lab!). All other things I just do it for the sake of survival. I was struggling in between whether I should tell her or not. At the end I decided to tell her. I was anticipating her to end the call. But we continued to chat after that. After the conversation, she wanted me to fill up some forms. Well, it shows a sign of me dropping off from the list now.
I still have form with me. I promised her I would send her the list by tommorow. I still don't know if I should fill it up because the info this head hunting company is looking are all in my resume. I think I am going to send them my resume instead.
Anyway, it doesn't look good. The projects that I am working are either they decide we couldn't do the job or it was Nigerian scam. Long hair hinted that I may have to expect a new family member maybe on his/her way now.
I have to find way to get out of this shit hole. The job market is pretty bad. My disadvantage is I have left the corporate world for too long that I must have something to prove that I am still able to be competent in this dog eats dog world.
Sometimes I feel so helpless and does not have the energy to live on in this aimless life. I have myself to blame for when I decided to come back 10 years ago. It was the greatest mistake I have ever done and I am now facing the consequence of my mistake!